purge and rant.

*sigh* I feeling down. I'm feeling jealous. I'm feeling like I need to get my shit together and get this ball rolling so I can stop thinking about how lame my life is. I'm just so sick and tired of a lot of things. I'm sick of friends taking me for granted. I'm sick of being invisible to guys that I'm interested. Yeah, they think I'm cool and "wife material" but just not cool to date. They just need to be hit in the fucking balls and kicked to the curb...along with all those crappy people that say they are my "friends" but they just say hey *looks around* Oh gotta jet but we should totally be BFFs online okay! XD.....=.=...right... Don't get me wrong, there are some people I would love to hang out with that I never get that chance to. I just wish I could. I suck as being a friend. I love love LOVE my friends, I'm there for them in a "in spirit" sense but when it comes to hanging out I just get so stuck in my shell thinking I'll say the wrong thing. heh. I don't get it.
I just want to purge all the crappy stuff in my life. I got tons of clutter that needs to go away.
About my life so far... well I work and I come home. My BFF doesn't talk to me anymore (woo!) and the guy I am interested in, told me he should have dated me. But he's emotionally unavailable and my other friend, well she's busy being all christian like finding solace in Jesus because her guy is a perv. So I sit at home wondering why I can't drink at home and not get yelled at on how I'm going to be an alcoholic if I keep it up. Yup, this is my sad life. Awesome! Jealous? I totally know you are.